A Lesson from the Universe

So many lessons were learnt yesterday at Morfa Isaf Farm at my latest 'gather' event but here is one that has arisen since yesterday that I will need to think about for some time ...

At the start of gather yesterday, we all agreed we could take photographs and use them on line for blogs and facebook. Some people had very posh cameras, tablets, others, like me, used their phone.

This morning I realised that I had pictures of everyone throughout the day but that I didn't have any pictures of me sharing my practice of Mantra & Mudra. I was a bit disappointed because it is the first time I have shared my practice in this way and it is also the first time my old ovation guitar has been out her case since being re-fretted.

I contacted the other creatives, one of whom is doing a degree in photography, surely she would have pictures of me under that billowing fir tree singing with my old ovation & Tibetan singing bowls in the sunlight.

But no. She said she had been so in the moment that she had not taken any of me.

So I contacted my friend Sam to see if her partner had taken any photo's of me because I noticed she had quite a big posh camera but her memory card had run out during my sharing and kicked back in later during the day.

Isn't that interesting that the Universe did not want me to have photographs of myself sharing my practice? Instead she wanted me to hold onto the memory of how it felt.

I understand this lesson. When people take photographs of me they are usually terrible and I

get caught up in that squirm-ish feeling of inadequacy. 

Thus, the Universe through her gift of this lesson, has enabled me to live in the moment and remember the moment and not a flat 2 dimensional image of the moment.

Now then, straight after the sharing, a guest staying at Morfa Isaf Farm called me over and said 'I hope you didn't mind me filming you. It was so beautiful we wanted a record of it.' and I felt uncomfortable with this.

'I didn't know you filmed me.' I said. 

After all, I had my eyes shut for half the time!

Usually I would have said, 'Do you mind wiping it because you haven't asked my permission'.

It is important to be mindful about empowerment when using modern technology. 

But I did not listen to my initial internal feeling. I kept very calm and inner still. She had filmed it on her tablet and so instead, I asked her if she could download a copy of the film for me, onto Mandy's computer and I could put it on my memory stick but she didn't have her computer lead with her. I gave her my email address and maybe she will send me it ... or maybe she will not.

In many ways, both of these instances are great compliments. On the one hand, my fellow creatives were so with me in the moment that they did not feel compelled to photograph me. Perhaps it felt too intimate, a moment too sacred to be disrupted with the invasion of modern age digitalisation. 

Or maybe they were so involved in the mantra and mudra that it just did not enter their minds to take photographs ... which is brilliant! The mantra worked!

On the other hand, the woman who had not been in our gather group, who had watched from afar, wanted to keep a record of what she had witnessed. This is indeed a compliment even though she inadvertently dis-empowered me in so doing.

I could see in her eyes a longing to 'be' with us. 

'Are you an artist too?' I asked and she explained she was an author. I invited her to join us down by the yurt. She left her husband sat in the sun and came to gather with us instead. Later she shared her newly published story in the yurt with us.

I thank both those who respected the sacred space within my sharing and I thank those who recorded the sacred space from without.

It will be interesting to see if she sends me the film and if she does, whether I decide to watch it given my learnings from this lesson sent to me today.

Namaste

gather at Morfa Isaf

For those of you who have been following my blog for some time, you will remember that I started my Fusion Inspire journey at Morfa Isaf, in a field overlooking Llangrannog at the home of fellow creative and dear friend, Amanda Painting. It was at this place that I walked with a shaman healer and a dear friend across the fields, setting our intentions in the sunset.

So much has happened since then! I decided to return to Morfa Isaf Farm and bring my new concept 'gather' to this sacred place.

My first gather planted poetry seeds with a Spoken Word Event that I organised at Surf Cafe in Bury port. There is a regular gather there now without me, and one of the poets who attended was inspired to open his own Spoken Word Event called Tin Plate Poets in Cross Hands, who meet monthly.

But I didn't 'feel' that gather. It was great fun, but I didn't feel it creatively. I felt like 'the organiser' and not a creative. By returning to Morfa Isaf, collaborating with my friend Amanda Painting in kindly sharing her beautiful home, I would be returning to my own creative roots and inner self.

And it worked. 

Yesterday was the first time in more years than I can remember, that I wasn't so stressed about 'the event' and this enabled me to be still & hold a space within me for myself, to be a creative, to experiment and to share my own practice with my peers.

I suffer terribly from nerves and stress just before an event that I am organising and this consumes me to the extent that I can not deal with my nerves as a 'performer'. It had become that I did not perform at Events I organise, in order to deal with this. But I have never intended to be an Event Organise over being a creative!

My MA drama has made me question the notion of performance and authentic self, and also to chose audience as a creative and this has had a huge impact on my practice. I will forever be indebted to my Superviser Jodie Allinson, who guided me on this tumultuous journey, because it was her voice and steady hand that I felt hold me strong in the sunshine, under the billowing fir tree sharing Mantra, Mudra & personal story.

And so it is that this morning I feel calm and beautiful and overjoyed and part of something bigger than the sum of its parts.

I thank my gorgeous fellow creatives for the threads that we hold between us.

And in my heart I know this, just by coming together in this way, by 'be'ing the human being that the Universe intended, we are making change. How utterly beautiful is that.

Come gather with me

                                   

So, what is gather?

Essentially, gather is an idea I had and if you read my blog regularly, you know what happens when I have ideas!

The idea was based on a growing need to feel more connected with the events I  organise. As they grew bigger and bigger (the last one had 13,000 people through the gates in 2 days) so my creativity became marginalized and I seemed to spend all of  my spare time organizing events for other artists to share their work, whilst having no space to pursue my own journey. The balance had become unequal (again).

My view is that a large sector of society has come to equate 'success' with BIG but actually, through my MA, I have come to realize distinctly, that depth can be equally, if not more powerful and far reaching as breadth.

              

The first of my gathering experiments was in Burry Port this week, in a lovely little cafe owned by Alex Norton called The Surf Bar Cafe. 

                             

I live in Llanelli and I have been working in Plas Y Mor Day Centre for Older Folk as a Consultant for Joseph Rowntree Foundation as part of the DEEP Project based at Swansea University. (Developing Evidence Enriched Research). 

Using Storytelling and Poetry, Music and Song, I have created a self help CD to help people with dementia lead their own table top choirs, working closely with Betti Williams, a 96 year old woman living in Burry Port.

During my lunch break one day, I popped into the Surf Bar Cafe and got chatting to Alex who offered to help at the Day Centre. He was so kind and community spirited and trying so hard to make a go of his business in Burry Port, that I wanted to give him something back. To help him in some way so that his generosity was reciprocated. I talked with him about gather and asked him if he would like me to organise one for him.

I decided that the space lended itself well to a small intimate Spoken Word Evening where experienced, through to novice,performers could come and experiment or share their work.

Then I put a shout out on my facebook.

The following team were allocated spots:

                                              

Me: 

I gave a Haiku or two about presence, experimented with a tibetan singing bowl to restore peace in the room & shared a song I had written with Betti about her time as a girl growing up in Parc Howard, Llanelli

Sam Collins from Llanelli

Gifted and experienced creative Artist Sam, performed her experimental Live Blog for the first time.

                              

Mark Montinaro

A Touring Actor  from Laugharne gave us poems and monologues from his recent tour.

Ron Savory from Cross Hands

Known more for his vast experience and talent as a singer/songwriter, this was only Ron's 6th Spoken Word Event, we would never have known tho.

SJ Alexanderson / Arthur Pineapple

I hadn't met Arthur before in person but I knew his work from a facebook poetry gallery that we both belong to. I am so glad that he was able to come and share his 'poetry with social conscience' 

                              

Alongside these gifted & very experienced Artists, I created  Open Spots for:

Marilyn Williams who read us her own story

David Wallington who took us back to the 1950's

Lee Weston shared his journal from a trip to Scotland

Kymer gave us a Spoken Word rendition of Jimmi Hendrix

Shelly Underhill-Savage sung us her beautifully crafted self penned songs

& Alex Norton shared the story of The Surf Bar Cafe

    foto by Lee Weston

The evening was a resounding success on 2 very important levels.

First, because everyone had a fabulous time. I had tremendous feedback. Lee Weston said:

'Such a fantastic night, I hope the energy created seeps into every orifice of Burry port and it's neighbours, soul medicine!!'

The second level is the one that meets my core aim of gather, the reason why I  give of my time to do it. Lee Weston and Alex Norton have decided to run their own gather Spoken Word Events on a regular basis at the Surf Bar Cafe and Ron Savory is planning to run a gather Spoken Word Event in Cross Hands, where he owns and runs his Music Shop Sticks and Picks.

Like I said on the night: 'You do not need a 'Cheryl' to run your own gather-ing!'

... on the night Ron said to me 'from little acorns...' and the end of that saying is ' big trees grow' but it got me thinking that actually, some really beautiful little and equally as important trees can grow from small acorns too.

My next gather event is on the land of the very beautiful Morfa Isaf Farm in May. I have invited 8 artists  to share their creativity with each other and bring friends. We will promenade from the edge of Llangrannog, overlooking the sea, inland Kirtan singing with 'Louise Thorndycraft Blue Sky Yoga' and spend the day trying out new creative ideas together, building partnerships for the future.

In June, I am taking an inter-generational team of 12 Artists to the Promenade Festival in Tramore, Ireland having been kindly invited to put together a Welsh Team by Artistic Director Sean Corcoran & Tramore Tourism.

I feel that in Burry Port this week, I have begun to plough the land, planting the first of deeply considered saplings . I will smile knowing that they do not need me to grow but that I made them possible. 

PS: There is no 'funding' for gather. I do this because I can. Thanks for reading.

PPS. Keep an eye on the Llanelli Star over the next 2 weeks. They are kindly accepting a story that will be written by Kay Owen who came along on the night.

www.cherylbeer.co.uk